Originally posted: Thursday, March 3, 2011
Polite
Since when was being polite the end all and be all?
You know-- they used to tell us in school to 'just walk away from bullies' or 'just be nice and kill them with kindness'. But it is proven that doesn't work and is not an effective tool. What works is basically calling them out on their bullying and having others around them do the same. What works is setting boundaries with the bully.
It's sad to have bullies lurking in your own family--- and confusing because it's not a label that comes to mind until late into the bullying game--- you think it's just the culture of your family. I just saw an Oprah where two girls were raped daily by their father and brothers and they just thought it was normal. Sometimes families can be more toxic than any hallway bully at school.
My basic point is:
"The polite thing to do is not always the right thing to do."
You know-- they used to tell us in school to 'just walk away from bullies' or 'just be nice and kill them with kindness'. But it is proven that doesn't work and is not an effective tool. What works is basically calling them out on their bullying and having others around them do the same. What works is setting boundaries with the bully.
It's sad to have bullies lurking in your own family--- and confusing because it's not a label that comes to mind until late into the bullying game--- you think it's just the culture of your family. I just saw an Oprah where two girls were raped daily by their father and brothers and they just thought it was normal. Sometimes families can be more toxic than any hallway bully at school.
My basic point is:
"The polite thing to do is not always the right thing to do."
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