Lentil Soup

Huge hit in my house!

4 hours on high in the crockpot (usually done by 2-3 hours, too)-- makes 20 servings

Ingredients:
1 pkg dried green lentils (16 oz)
2 tsp thyme
2 carrots, finely chopped
2 ribs celery, finely chopped
3 boullion cubes (I use Rapunzel vegetable with sea salt)
Salt & pepper to taste
10 cups water
(Plus more below)

Directions:
Put all of the above in crockpot and set on high for 4 hours


At the very end of cook time, chop one onion and 2 cloves garlic-- saute in a bit of oil.  When browned, add to the soup.

Serve!

Stayed good in fridge up to 1 week

Applesauce Muffins

My 11 month old son LOVES muffins.
This is a recipe I came up with as a combo of a few others and substitutions of my own.

Ingredients:
(makes 24)
3 cups oats
2.5 cups flour
2/3 cup maple syrup (grade B preferred, but use any all natural maple syrup)
2 tsp baking powder
1.5 tsp baking soda
2 tsp cinnamon
1/2 tsp salt
1 jar unsweetened organic applesauce (24 oz)
1 cup almond milk
3 tbsp canola oil
2 eggs

Directions:
In large bowl, combine all dry ingredients, mix well
In medium bowl, combine all wet ingredients, mix well
Combine
PAM the muffin tray (I use silicone)
Fill muffin cups to the top

Bake at 325 for 29 minutes

Making Hamantaschen for Mishloach Manot Baskets

So... if you aren't Jewish the subject of this might make you wonder if I had a tiny stroke while typing.

Nope!  It's almost Purim!  And to stay true to character (not a perfectionist) let me paste some info here about the baskets (which is where Easter got their basket idea, tho I like this better because KIDS GIVE the baskets as gifts and receive a piece of candy for delivering vs. just getting a basket of candy):

KEY:
Hamentaschen- pastries shaped like Haman's hat
Mischloach Manot- Purim Basket
Mitzvah- Good deed
Purim- A Jewish holiday-- this is the actual holiday where we get gifts (Hanukkah became that way, but isn't historically a gift holiday) and we also dress up in costume and get drunk.  We like to joke that it's Halloween meets St. Patty's Day + more.  A festive meal and costume party is part of the celebration.  Giving a Purim basket to two friends with food in it is required.  One of the more interesting things about Purim is it is the only story where God's name is never mentioned once, and no magical miracles--it is all about the Jewish people coming together and... sort of making their own miracle.

Mishloach manot, literally, "sending of portions"; also called a Purim basket, are gifts of food or drink The mitzvah of giving mishloach manot derives from the Book of Esther. It is meant to ensure that everyone has enough food for the Purim feast held later in the day, and to increase love and friendship among Jews as a counter to Haman's assertion that the Jewish people are characterised by strife and disunity.

According to the halakha, every Jew over the age of Bar and Bat Mitzvah should send a food gift consisting of two different types of food to at least one recipient. The practice is a fairly prominent feature of Purim.

Two different mitzvot: the sending of two different, ready-to-eat foods and/or drinks to one friend (known by the Hebrew term, mishloach manot), and the distribution of two charitable donations (either money or food) to two poor people.

Poor people are also required to give mishloach manot. One who cannot afford to buy food for his friend may exchange his own food with that of his friend — this fulfills both their obligations.

This mitzvah may not be fulfilled by giving items other than food. Money or other material items cannot suffice. Only food gifts fulfill this mitzvah.

So--- we set out to start on the Hamantaschen today.  It's kind of a long process for just 16 of them in the end.

I like to make my own filling so it's simple and fresh, but you can just buy apricot preserves.

To make your own, buy a bag of organic apricots, put 5-6 in each muffin spot, cover completely with water, and bake at 350 for 45 minutes.

Remove from oven, put all of it including water into a food processor, add 1/4 cup cold water and puree 60 seconds.  The entire bag makes enough to fill probably 100 Hamantaschen, so adjust to your amount.  Pureed apricot is also great for babies or smoothies or added to oatmeal or yogurt, so plenty of ways to use the leftovers.

Make the dough (see the end of this post)

Roll it out

Find a nice large round thing to cut circles with-- I used the second largest stacker in my baby's toy stackers, ha!  You want something wider than a cup rim, but not so big as a coffee can.

Put just a bit of filling in the center of each circle-- less than a tablespoon usually--but do it to your taste.

Pinch the 3 corners creating a triangle.  It's very important to really seal off the 3 corners or they will open up in the oven.  (The ones I let my kids do usually open up)  ;)

As you can see, my 6 yr old loved the apricot puree so much she asked for a little to eat-- and that is just PLAIN apricots and water!  Why give them extra sugar if they love that!?

Bake and cool... eat, or put in mishloach manot baskets!

RECIPE:

makes 16

2 cups flour

1/2 cup cane sugar

2 tsp baking powder

1 tsp vanilla

1/2 cup butter

2 eggs

1 tsp orange juice (it really makes it, don't leave it out!)

apricots OR apricot preserves

(Get apricots baking, see above)

1. In a large bowl, mix dry ingredients

2.  Cut in butter

3.  Add beaten eggs & extracts and mix well to form dough into ball, roll & cut circles, etc

4.  Bake at 350 for 25 min

Challah Baking

I recently came across 2 articles about a scary ingredient in bread, azodicarbonamide-- described as something used in making plastics like yoga mats.  AH!

Looked on the back of my yummy fresh challah from Publix-- BOOM-  azodicarbonamide.  

So-- to start-- I set out to make my own challah.  I have 3 small kids, it's not really a project I was excited about-- but I researched and found a recipe that looked authentic and yummy-- I like a very eggy and very NON-sweet challah-- and I saw it made 2 large challahs.  I figured I'd make 4-5 minis and freeze them... because who needs to really consume an entire challah every Friday?

I took this recipe and tweaked it based on comments and my own preferences.  I made 11 mini challahs!  WHOA.  It came out tasting good, but definite;ly not the typical challah--- it's like a healthy challah.

Next time I think I'll add 4 more eggs or yolks--it just needed to be more eggy---  when I do, I'll come back and edit this and tell you the results!

Meanwhile-- I'll go freeze 10 of my 11 loaves.  ;)

My version:
INGREDIENTS:
2.5 cups warm water
1 tbsp active dry yeast (approx 1.5 packets)
1/4 cup honey
4 tbsp canola oil
3 egg yolks+ 1 egg 
Additional egg for egg wash
1 tbsp salt
8 cups King Arthur Organic White Whole Wheat Flour

Directions

1. In a large bowl, sprinkle yeast over barely warm water. Beat in honey, ---- then let it proof for 10 minutes.  Beat in oil, 3 egg yolks, 1 egg, and salt. Add the flour one cup at a time, beating after each addition, graduating to kneading with hands as dough thickens. Knead until smooth and elastic and no longer sticky, adding flour as needed. Cover with a damp clean cloth and let rise for 1 1/2 hours or until dough has doubled in bulk.
2. Punch down the risen dough and turn out onto floured board. Divide in half and knead each half for five minutes or so, adding flour as needed to keep from getting sticky. Divide each half into thirds and roll into long snake about 1 1/2 inches in diameter. Pinch the ends of the three snakes together firmly and braid from middle. Either leave as braid or form into a round braided loaf by bringing ends together, curving braid into a circle, pinch ends together. Grease two baking trays and place finished braid or round on each. Cover with towel and let rise about one hour.
3. Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).
4. Beat the remaining egg and brush a generous amount over each braid. 
5. Bake at 375 degrees F (190 degrees C) for 25 minutes. Bread should have a nice hollow sound when thumped on the bottom. Cool on a rack for at least one hour before slicing.

On God

When my oldest was in Kindergarten, I went to a parent discussion with our Rabbi about how to talk to your kids about God.  I loved ALL of what he said and shared, and while I can't transcribe all 60 minutes of discussion- especially over a year later- I'll share some of the biggest takeaways for me.

The year before my daughter came home from her Jewish preschool scared of God one day.  She said, "Morah Rachel said God is EVERYWHERE!"  Ha!  So, I became interested in healthy ways to talk to her about God, especially since I am not exactly sure where I stand on God-- I definitely believe in something bigger than us-- and I believe we are all connected--but my views on God specifically have changed a lot (and continue to) from when I was her age.

(While I'd love to share in story form, I'm afraid I'll never post if I do it that way-- this draft has been sitting here for a year!)

• The BIG one:  Don't say anything about God that, when they grow up, they will take as a lie.  Or-- take as an untruth is maybe a better way to put it.  'God lives in the sky and watches over everyone', etc. If you say, "God watches over everyone.", when they are older... if they lose someone, or something... that might not feel true to them anymore.  Why did God let that person get sick? etc.
• Don't be afraid to say, "I don't know".  I loved this part of the Rabbi's explanation... this is one subject where we're likely on the same level as our children.  Let them know YOU are still figuring it all out, too.  In fact-- that makes it easier for them to trust the whole thing rather than unwavering faith no matter what.  (Loved this.)  I told my daughter, "I used to believe______, now I believe _______, but we are always learning new things and changing our minds about what/who God is or means... let me know when you have new ideas about it, maybe it'll help me!"
• Don't give vague answers:  God is everywhere can sound scary, God is always watching (scary), etc.

I'm going to link to two articles he gave us that day, but I'll also credit and paste some passages from each in case links fail in the future...

My biggest take away is this:  Listen, answer honestly, don't be afraid to say "I don't know", and give them the same answers at 6 as you would at 30 -- (this is MY take away).

Emily  :)

1. How to Talk to Your Kids About God by Rabbi David Wolpe

1. Ask. Studies show that almost all children by the age of six have some developed concept of God. Ask them. Do not allow your own preconceptions to determine the range of their curiosity -- let them think, speculate, dream, imagine. Children will grow in their understanding, but only if we do not cut off conversation by dictating the "truth" or by evading the issue.

2. Tell Stories. Stories encourage children to form concepts of character. To learn about God, tell the stories of the Bible, the midrashic or teaching legends, incidents from your own life. Children are less adept at manipulating abstract concepts than they are at understanding concrete operational ideas. Along with stories, use descriptive language: Rather than "God knows everything" try to be specific: "God is the one who helps us to grow."

3. Bring God into everyday life. Tell your children that God loves them. Explain that the world is filled with evidence of God''s concern and artistry. If the language seems alien or difficult, find ways to ease into it. "Who loves you?" Go through a list -- parents, siblings, grandparents, and God. Remember that Judaism is filled with ideas of God''s love, in the prayers, in the Bible. And our best known prayer, theSh'ma, exhorts us to love God back.

4. Do not be defensive at challenges. Thoughtful children -- especially once they enter into adolescence -- will challenge our religious ideas. That is a sign of thoughtfulness. When we are angry or defensive we show our own insecurities, our unease with the religious ideas we profess. Welcome the challenge -- recognize that there are many good reasons to doubt God''s existence or benevolence. Engage in a dialogue, not a diatribe.

5. Learn good answers. There are no definitive answers to difficult questions, but there are good ones. Try not to fall into the trap of giving facile answers that may satisfy a six year old, but will be transparently unacceptable when the child is older and more sophisticated. It is better not to be understood yet than to misrepresent the complexity of the issues. Still, in many cases hard questions can be addressed very early: "If God dwells everywhere, is God in my pocket?" The appropriate answer to this is to explain the difference between physical and non-physical objects. The wind is invisible, but physical. Love is intangible. Ask a child "where is love?" You cannot point to it, but you can feel it. The same is true with God.

There is no one idea of God in Judaism. Our tradition is as rich theologically as it is culturally and historically. 

Our aim is not answers but spiritual growth. Allow yourself to be open to the directions that spiritual exploration can take you. Once again, as so often, through teaching our children, we learn.

2.  How to Talk About God by Rabbi Sarah Reines

1. Judaism does not have a rigid understanding of God.
2. There is no "right answer."
3. Positively reinforce your child's curiosity.
4. Try to speak of God from a soulful place, rather than an intellectual one.
5. Actions often speak louder than words.
6. Read!

When people tell me they don't believe in God, I ask them to describe the God they don't believe in. When they finish I say in agreement, "I don't believe in that God either." 

When our preschool children ask us why the sky is blue, we can go to the internet for a scientific answer, but a description of the atmosphere's composition and electromagnetic waves may not be what they need. In the same way, a theological discourse on whether or not God is omniscient or omnipotent will likely miss the mark. Children's questions may be a way for them to express their burgeoning spirituality. Leave space for your children to keep questioning and thinking for themselves. Engage in a conversation, rather than struggle to provide an answer. Spirituality requires questioning, imagining, and openness.

Often, children are more spiritually astute than adults. Give your child the space to explore this aspect of themselves. A legitimate, supportive, and honest answer can be, "That's a wonderful question. I ask myself that question sometimes. What do you think?"

Simple rituals can let God into our lives and our children's lives. When we light Shabbat candles and pause to watch the flames dance, sing the Shema in a whisper before tucking our child into bed, gather the loose coins in the bottom of purses and pockets and set them aside for tzedakah (charity), we foster an environment which will allow spirituality to flourish.

Books about God or books with a Jewish flavor can help provide language and focus for us. Sandy Eisenberg Sasso's God's Paintbrush and In God's Name are non-denominational picture books with beautiful illustrations which provoke and directly ask questions that you can discuss with your child. Some books for adult reading on this topic are When Children Ask About God by Rabbi Harold Kushner and Teaching Your Children About God by Rabbi David Wolpe.

For many, becoming a parent ushers in a newly-found or recovered sense of the Divine. The miracle of birth, the wonder of raising a child, opens our eyes anew to God's presence in our world. Allow your children to continue to lead you in this awe-inspiring journey of discovery.

Cure for a non-sleeping baby: The Chiropractor

My third baby gave me the biggest run for my money in terms of sleep.
Things were decent til the 4 month sleep regression.
Then from 4-8.5 mos, it became worse and worse.
Of course, I know "sleeping through the night" is technically defined at 5 hours for a baby.
That would have been a godsend.  He wasn't going more than 2 straight hours sleeping.  By 8 months, baby boy was waking an average of 6 times a night--and some of those wakes he was inconsolable and could stay up crying while we rocked him for up to 90 minutes.  . Nothing worked- not rocking, nursing, playing-- nothing.  That would wake the other two kids up.  It was hellish.
It was a really tough time with lots of tears and coffee.

At some point I remembered vaguely hearing about people taking babies to the chiropractor starting at 1 week old!  I immediately Googled it, and within 5 minutes made the baby an appointment.

He had his first appointment at 8 months, 18 days old.  The chiro told me to give it 2-3 adjustments (visits) before we might see some improvement.  After the first visit, not much change at all.  Second visit was 5 days later.  That night, he woke up on 3 times and it was a bit quicker to get him down.  3rd visit was another week later... that night he slept 6 hours straight.  6 hours!!!!!!!!


He is now 10.5 months old and sleeps most nights 8pm-5am STRAIGHT.  I take him every other week for adjustments.

Here he is last week watching his sister get adjusted:

Of course I can't promise you anything--but my friend Rachel just took her son, and after the first visit, he was sleeping 5 hours straight.

So, for something non-invasive or labor intensive for you-- it's worth a try!

Baby Girl Hair: When, Why, and How

When my first daughter was about 9 months old, someone gave me really good advice... she said "Start doing her hair NOW, even if she doesn't have much.  If you wait till she has enough hair then it isn't part of the routine and it becomes such a battle."

I think she was onto something.

So, this is the baby at 12 months with hair up and hair down:

TIPS:

• Use a boar-bristled brush (pictured)
• Use a spray bottle to get the fine hairs is-- my goal is to only have to do hair ONE time for the entire day
• Keep all the stuff in a Caboodle-- it's organized and babies can't open it.
• I taught them early "resist me" and after a few months they learned to pull back against me
• Let them watch TV while you do it at first
• Don't EVER cut bangs.  Like, ever.  Okay, it's your call-- but my daughter had really thick hair and I thought it would be cute and easy.  Was cute but not easy.  Nope--- and it took 3 years to grow them out.  And she has pretty fast growing hair!  

Could you leave the hair alone everyday?  Sure.  But summer time, snack time, meal time... these are messy things-- and I find a few minutes of putting hair up saves a lot of stress later in the day.  And starting at 1, I think, helps it be a routine.  My second daughter was bald at 1 year, but I still had her sit and sort of pretended.  ;)  

Good luck!

Dear 50 Year Old Me

Dear 2030 Me:

Do you miss your little babies?

Well... in a haze of exhaustion, let me write to you from 34 year old me....

Everyday I feel like I'm missing it--- the milestones come fast at these ages.  Especially the baby.  I sold the baby swing yesterday and cried.  I can't believe I've reached the mile marker where I'll never have a child small enough to go into a baby swing.  I can't believe I'll never be pregnant again even though I am not someone who enjoys pregnancy.  I'll never think up another baby name with my husband or wonder how long my labor will be or if the baby will come early or late.  I'll never get to be pregnant and still do agile and nutty things making people go, "Ahhh!  Don't do that!" I'll forever be trying to share my labor stories with pregnant moms in a desperate attempt to still feel part of the group still having babies.

I'm so tired I often snap at my kids, even when they are trying to show me something-- I can hear my 50 year old self saying, "in 10 years they will NOT want to share with you, so listen up NOW, you idiot!"  But, 2030 Emily... please remember... on this little sleep, with this many people needing you, hitting you, having all-out tantrums that wake the baby, inciting a tantrums in their sibling right when you calm #3 down, spilling things, strewing toys in their wake.... while all of this probably sounds like "cute" problems to have in the future... right now it is HARD.  Please don't 'grow up' and tell another mother to "enjoy every minute of this time".  It just makes them feel worse-- as if wearing sweatpants and snot encrusted shirts while being overweight, out of the loop, and exhausted doesn't feel lame enough... now we are supposed to ENJOY every minute.  It is tough to enjoy this time... I think it's made tougher knowing we will regret NOT enjoying it.  Who came up with this plan?  The "precious time" is the time when you are physically at your lowest.

I do have moments where gratitude overwhelms me.  Thank goodness for those.  Why is it when we have these moments we feel like we should be having MORE of them, and we feel guilty.  But, Sondheim really explained it best, "If life were only moments... then you'd never know you had one."

I think this is why my generation of moms over-snap the pictures... overdo it on Facebook and Instagram and Pinterest.  Maybe we feel the more we document, the less we are missing... or maybe just some ridiculous part of our brain thinks we can go back when we have time and enjoy it later. I am an only child and I maybe have 25 pictures of myself from birth to 10 years old.  Each of my kids have thousands.  I recently heard this advice, "Go ahead and take the picture, but then put the camera down and enjoy the rest of the experience."  But, 2030 Emily... when you look at all these pictures... don't forget the yelling and bribing beforehand trying to get everyone to look and smile... don't forget the immediate smack the middle one gave her older sister 2 seconds after the picture.  Don't forget poop was leaking out the side of the diaper onto your shirt that you had to wear around the zoo the rest of the day.  Don't forget you had a plugged duct and your boob was on fire that day.  Or that your pants were half peed from a  sneeze.  Or that your husband's eyelids kept drooping from exhaustion.  That you longed for a time when the kids could help with dinner, when no one was pooping their pants, and when everyone was tall enough to go on the ride so you didn't have to split up and could do something as a whole family.

So... even though you miss these sweet babies (and they are sweet)... remember at 34 you thought, "I can't wait to have a deep conversation with Zoe, I think she is going to be so tuned in to the world, I can't wait to hear her thoughts on stuff."  Or, "I can't wait til they can wipe their own tushies so I can finish (start?) my lunch without having to touch someone else's poop."  I can't wait to see what our family is like when we are all sitting at the dinner table talking with these three amazing kids who are becoming adults.  I can't wait to see if Teagan is still the performer she naturally is now, or if my always-wants-to-be-held baby grows into the sensitive man I imagine in my mind.  Remember, 2030 Emily-- you KNOW these 3 kids as actual grown(ish) people now-- you'd be going back and seeing them little but knowing them as they are now--- I only know the baby as a sweet non-talking, non-walking little friend.  I can't wait to know what his voice sounds like-- the kinds of things he's interested in, etc.

Also, don't forget... 34 year old me is out 16 years of the experience you have.  6+ years ago when I became a mom, I didn't have even one of the many tools I've acquired over the last 6 years.  It's easy for me to look at friends with just one baby and think how much easier their day is... but it isn't really true.  It would be easier for ME-- now, 6 years and 3 kids later.  But, when it was me with just one, I was navigating every tiny lesson.

And 15 years ago? 19 year old me?

Sure... If I could tell her to stop being so afraid of failure-- fail MORE, actually, you'll get better at stuff (and braver). Embrace feeling lonely, because it won't last, I promise.  But, you can't learn things til you learn them, you know?  You can't have the wisdom of 34 years at 19 years.  I can't be 50 year old me enjoying this time now.

So... Don't wish for these days... The saying is true, "the days are long but the years are short".  These days are freak in' loooooooong.  Especially 4-8pm--it's an all out battleground of chaos, loudness, and things to wipe!  I promise you I think about it everyday-- that I will miss these days soon enough, so to squeeze something out of everyday.  But it's tough to revel in the 'good ole days' when you are in the middle of them.  There are beds to strip at 4am because someone peed, dinners to make while holding a crying baby and sweating, a great novel or movie theater to look at longingly.  Most days I feel a pang of sadness when I look at my two older children sleeping and realize 80% of my energy has gone to the baby yet another day.  I feel like I'm missing so much of them because he needs me more right now-- I'm eager to fall back into a groove where I can give enough to each of them most days-- or at least be switching up who needs me most on any given day.  That you missed Zoe's school performance because it was at 7:30pm which is exactly when baby is nursing and going to bed, and it made more sense for Daddy to go.  That you missed baking Hamentaschen in the girls classes because it was smack during nap time.  That you wish you could be room mom, but you can't drag a 3 yr old and baby with you AND help a class full of 1st graders.

I do think it would be brilliant if we all got 10 days in our life to trade with future and past selves-- they'd HAVE to be mundane days-- nothing big could be changed-- just simply to enjoy them from afar.  (And to get some sleep... hey, 4 months postpartum it would be awesome to trade a day with 50 year old me when my teenagers are sleeping til 11am.)

I think the hardest part of parenthood is that you bring a flawed person to the job.  You're not having a baby at 75 years old... for me, I was in my late 20s when I became a mother... far from enlightened.  6+ years later, all I can say is that I've learned I have more to learn.

So, 2030 Emily... don't berate yourself for not enjoying these years more.  When you are well rested it's easy to shrug that off and say "even so...".  No!  Not 'even so'!  Sleep deprivation and having to meet 3 other people's basic needs is all-consuming--it's survival mode around here.  Don't forget about the long stretch of time when you're exhausted but too anxious to sleep because the baby wakes crying at 9pm, 11:10pm, 1am, 2:45am, 4am, 5am, and 6:40am and then you drag yourself to go grocery shopping only to have some older lady tell you,"enjoy this time, this is the best age!"... Is it?  Really?

Feel confident knowing 2014 me is doing her best.   Amongst too much TV, impatience, and nachos for lunch too often, I still get in tickle fights, tea parties, walks, surprise treats, cuddles, and abandoning the to-do list for some fun instead.  I'm proud just to be able to stay up past 10pm having interesting conversations with my husband.

I can't think of a good way to end this letter to you, so I'll leave you with a bit of Andy from the finale of The Office...

Love (and compassion),
2014 Emily